Dear Flight Attendant... — You Know How You Do

dear flight attendant who greeted me as i boarded the plan, “Yaaaas, she’s giving cool, comfy and collected realness. I love it.” that is the best compliment i’ve ever received and i hold it in the highest regard. women dress for themselves, for other women and gay men. it’s actually rule of culture #658 “women don’t dress for straight men”.

this is for me, all for me, even when i make poor choices, like flowy shorts at the gym. any kind of stretching on the floor guarantees an appearance of your underwear and i love me some loud underwear. i did a photoshoot for Thunderpants and i frolicked in their studio with other folks like me and somewhere on the internet are photos of my lumpy weird body out there for all the other weird lumpy weird bodies to see, you’re not the only one with a short torso and long femurs and an awkward asymmetrical smile, one eye in a popeye squint and the other like it’s seen a ghost. what is the word that’s like gangly but for short squatty hotties who can’t reach things on the top shelf?